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Conflict is a Part of Life

Posted on May 1, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

 Words & Sketch by Dr Stan Steindl: Clinical Psychologist & Adjunct Associate Professor

Just as one might say “suffering is a part of life”, so too, it seems, conflict is a part of life.



Conflict is in our very nature. Every day, large or small, human conflicts are all around us. But conflict is simply a result of problems being tangled up with the darkside of human nature emerging from innate protection and competition motivations that have evolved over millions of years to help us survive, and that come with difficult tradeoffs. How can we disentangle ourselves and our problems from these more primitive motives and manage conflict better? By activating some of the best bits of what it is to be human, especially the awareness, wisdom, strength, intention and commitment…of COMPASSION.

I was riding my bike at the weekend just past, a leisurely stroll through suburban Brisbane, Australia, on a lazy Sunday afternoon, minding my own business. Riding along the road, I turned right at an intersection where a car was waiting to go the other way. As I past by, I looked through the window, and there was the driver, apparently yelling profanities at me, face contorted with anger, showing me one particular finger pressed up against his window. I’m not sure what had enraged him, I couldn’t hear anything he was saying through the closed window, but something I did presumably made him absolutely irate!

We almost can’t help but have conflicts like this. Sometimes it’s with random strangers, but we also have conflict with our spouses, family and friends, and neighbours. Sometimes gangs, groups or whole communities get into conflict. And of course, nations continue to go to war with devastating and often unnecessary suffering. All of these instances can be traced back to this human propensity to be in conflict.

Where Does This Propensity for Conflict and Violence Come From?

Professor Paul Gilbert, who, amongst many other appointments, is Honorary Professor at the School of Psychology, University of Queensland, and developer of Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT), has been known to say, “Well, you see, we have very tricky brains!” Professor Gilbert has done seminal work bringing together psychological science, neuroscience and evolutionary science, as well as the wisdom traditions, to understand the human brain and how it has evolved over millions of years to aid in our survival, but with tradeoffs. And conflict is one example of such a tradeoff.

Human beings have a highly responsive threat system. In fact, our brains have evolved to err on the side of seeing threats that perhaps aren’t there, rather than ever missing a threat that is there. And what was a likely threat to prehistoric humans? Well, most notably, other humans. Especially if those other humans were strangers, or looked, sounded or acted differently to us, and their motivations were unknown. “Us and them” mentalities became powerfully wired in the early human brains, and erring on the side of seeing others as a threat became part of how human beings operated.

Fast forward to today, and we see it all around us. We are very good at categorising people, labelling them, putting them in boxes. And if they are different to “us” then they are considered one of “them” and therefore a potential threat. “All these immigrants are taking our jobs!” Given the response that emerges from the threat system is fight or flight, often we choose to fight and thus conflict emerges. Think of all the sayings: “offence is the best defence” or “shoot first, ask questions later”. These simply represent our human brains, passed down to us through the eons of evolution, programmed for us through no choice of our own to respond to potential social threats with anger, aggression and conflict.

But this is not the only source of conflict. We also have an active drive system. After all, if the threat system was always running the show, then we would be tempted just to stay in the cave and never venture out for fear of the dangers around us. But we needed to leave the cave, to find food, water, kindling, tools, other resources, or a mate. The drive system evolved to help us do just that, but again with certain tradeoffs.

Food and water were scarce. Resources were scarce. And perhaps a mate was hard to come by! So competition became woven into the fabric of the drive system. This meant we had to get places first, we had to knock others out of the race, and sometimes we had to defeat or dispatch them in order to get what we needed (or wanted). A classic modern day example is road rage, where, in the anonymity of our car we scream and yell at others, cut them off in traffic, and generally get caught in competition-fuelled conflict on the road when they get in our way, slow us down or obstruct us from our destinations.

It is striking just how often people fall into primitive motives involving threat-protection and drive-competition. And it is common that these motives then lead to anger and aggression, and ultimately conflict. These are very important motives, very natural and innate, and built into our species. The upside is that they have helped us to survive. They do have downsides, such as anger, aggression, interpersonal conflict and violence, and yet these are not our fault. We need not blame or shame ourselves for these human propensities. We just need to ask ourselves, what can we do to start to take responsibility for these downsides of human nature, our darkside, so we step out of autopilot, consider and respond differently, and move away, where possible, from conflict?

Perhaps the answer begins with another innate system of the human brain: the soothing system. We had to protect ourselves from threats, and we had to compete for resources, but the other essential component of human survival is the ability to soothe, nurture and care for each other, especially our vulnerable young, as well as our elderly, sick, or injured. This mammalian motivation to care is a vital aspect to the human brain and human survival. The problem here, of course, is that the soothing system tends to be directed towards our own kin, family or tribe, and does not, left to its own devices, cross the “us and them” boundary. So something more is needed, something that can help us organise these three systems in order to enable change. Luckily, the human brain already has what we need.

The threat, drive and soothing systems are part of very old, in evolutionary terms, brain functions. In fact, many animals, especially mammals, share these systems with humans. However, humans have also evolved certain new brain functions such as imagining the future, remembering the past, being aware of oneself, understanding the minds of others, and being able to set intentions for ourselves. Now, these new brain functions can be tricky too, such as causing us worry, rumination and self-criticism, however they can be brought to bear in order to shape and change our experience and participation in conflict.

As an extension of these new brain functions, our capacity for social intelligence provides an opportunity for effectively navigating conflict. Our new brains help us to bring awareness to a situation, and to think about that situation carefully and wisely, and to arrive at an understanding of the nature of the conflict, and the role of our tricky brains in further exacerbating it. Our new brains then also help us to listen, understand and empathise, both in terms of what we ourselves might be feeling, as well as what the other person or party might be feeling, and why, and how each party might be affecting the other. And our new brains help us, with wisdom, strength, empathy and understanding, to intentionally commit to finding the right path such that we seek to be helpful in the situation rather than causing more harm, thus activating a compassionate motivation.

From Conflict to Compassion

From Conflict to Compassion

Compassionate Helpfulness, Forgiveness and Assertiveness

The Dalai Lama (1995) has defined compassion as a sensitivity to the suffering of self or others, with a deep commitment to alleviate or prevent it. This uniquely human motivation can be brought to conflict situations in powerful ways, giving rise to helpfulness, forgiveness and assertiveness. Compassion can aid us in managing our protection and competition motives, and motivate us to try to be helpful to all concerned. For example, imagine conflict with a neighbour over a boundary issue. Rather than digging our heels in and not giving an inch, compassion can bring us to a point of being able to consider, “What can I do so that all parties suffer less? What can I do that is most likely to be helpful to all parties?”

And compassion can allow us to see things clearly, and from the other party’s perspective, to connect with their essential humanness, and all the good bits and not so good bits that go along with that. With compassion, we can begin to forgive the other party for the threat, obstruction or hurt they may have caused, wittingly or unwittingly, as well as forgive ourselves for our own transgressions. And forgiveness is a gift! It is a gift to the other person, with whom we have a much greater chance of reconciliation, and it is a gift for ourselves, allowing us to let go of resentful or vengeful thoughts and feelings. After all, those thoughts and feelings are usually much more painful for the person experiencing them than the person they are being experienced about.

For example, imagine conflict over an incident in the traffic. Of course we can stay offended and resentful, and we can start plotting our revenge! Or we can understand that there are many factors that might lead up to that person behaving in that way, we can forgive them for their mistakes, and we can slow down a little, make room for them and let them in. Just think of the suffering this could prevent. This is itself an act of compassion.

And finally, compassion is about alleviating and preventing the suffering of self and others. Therefore, the answer to conflict is not about going to the other extreme of aggression and simply being submissive, giving in or letting people off the hook. Compassion can help us in being assertive, and coming to a respectful agreement with mutually beneficial solutions and outcomes. Compassionate assertiveness guides us towards compromise and fairness, self-reflection and improvement, and effective communication and appreciation. It is about being open to giving and receiving understanding, giving and receiving feedback, giving and receiving appreciation, and agreeing upon reasonable boundaries.

Imagine being criticised by a partner, family member or friend. We can so easily feel threatened or hurt, and the temptation is to become defensive and start attacking. We might lash back with, “How dare you! You are awful and horrible, and you have no right to speak to me that way. I hate you!! In fact, you’re the one who is the problem here!” Of course, this is likely to cause the other person to fire up right back at you. An assertive response that comes from a compassionate motivation might instead be, “When you say things like that it really hurts me. I know that it comes from a place of worry or frustration in you, and yet I get upset because it makes me feel like you really don’t care. Could we talk together about this in calm and kind ways, and see if we can understand where each of us is coming from?”

Steps Towards Compassionate Helpfulness, Forgiveness and Assertiveness

Steps Towards Compassionate Helpfulness, Forgiveness and Assertiveness

So, conflict is a part of life. Human beings have tricky brains, and often it is the threat-protection or drive-competition parts of our brains from which conflict emerges. And it can be very destructive. But it doesn’t have to be! Our brains bestow us with a range of comparatively newer functions, such as social intelligence, which, when brought to bear on experiences of conflict, can serve to guide us in ways that are much more effective. Our awareness, empathic understanding and ability to set intentions can activate a more compassionate motivation. Handled well, this allows us to find ways to be helpful rather than harmful, to be forgiving rather than resentful, and to be assertive rather than aggressive or submissive. And together, this allows ourselves and those we interact with to suffer less.

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Habits of a Healthy Mind

Posted on April 29, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

Mens sana in corpore sano– Latin for ‘sound mind, sound body’- okay so not exactly a news flash here but our modern lifestyles can make it harder than the simplistic motto would suggest. Sometimes, we need a little nudge, or gentle reminder to slow down, sub the chocolate for the cacao and reconnect with ourselves and others. 

So here’s what we consider habits of a healthy mind:

Eat Well- Eat Mindfully

True to the old saying; ‘You are what you eat’, our diet has an incredible impact on our mind, body and soul. There are strong links between poor diet and mental health and part of this can be due to the vicious cycle of guilt, weight gain and self-shaming. But it’s not just about what you eat but also about how you eat it. Enjoy your food, think about the connection you have with it, where it came from and how it is going to nourish your body. Eat distraction free, turn off your phone, TV or other distractions that you can control and try to focus on the taste, smell and feel of the food as you eat it.

It’s important to be aware of your physical cues vs emotional cues when it comes to eating. In short, eat when you are hungry not when you are tired, emotional or have ‘3:30itis’. Fulfil your emotional needs with something other than food, this might be a walk, a chat to a friend or something you consider personally indulgent.

Get Better Sleep

Note that did not say ‘Get More Sleep’ but ‘Get Better Sleep’. Sleep is the pillar of health and when it’s not good quality, your physical, emotional and mental health can head south pretty quickly. If you are struggling with sleep, seeking help is a must. Some basic sleep hygiene tips include, keeping your evenings technology free (really- yes really), avoid alcohol within a few hours of bed and reduce caffeine after 2pm.  Although it is important to exercise and in fact it can improve sleep quality, some research suggests avoiding it within 3 hours of bedtime.

Keep Active

Research and literature across the world concur that exercise is one of the key components to maintaining your health and wellbeing. This is even more apparent for those that suffer from acute or ongoing mental illness with findings showing exercise as highly effective strategy for alleviating depressive symptoms.

Be Kind to Yourself

There is much to be gained by being kind to yourself, just like there is emotional gain from being kind to others. As the Dalai Lama said; “If you have no compassion for yourself, then you are not able of developing compassion for others.” Cutting yourself some slack and not judging yourself will do wonders for your mind and soul.

Stay connected

There are strong correlations between loneliness and depression and anxiety with research showing prolonged loneliness negatively impacts the brain and can lead to stress and a range of mental health concerns. Staying physically connected with people is important, but the way we now communicate can make it a challenge.  We need to push past this and challenge ourselves to make meaningful connections with other humans. Shifting your perspective to values those meaningful human connections rather than counting the amount of relationships or friends you have, is a positive step towards a more confident and fulfilled you. Fostering these true connections by continuing to work on what makes that connection special, will help you both to thrive.

If you need help with emotional or psychological concerns, or just want to feel more fulfilled, visit our Brisbane Psychologists page to view our team of Clinical Psychologists.


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How Lack of Sleep Affects your Relationship

Posted on April 22, 2019 in Sleep - 0

We all know how it feels when you’ve not had enough sleep- tired, cranky, irritable, unproductive and overwrought. Even the simplest task can seem overwhelming and this is largely due to the fact that your brain and cognitive function is not operating at optimal levels.

So, it’s not surprising that when it comes to navigating a relationship, sleep deprivation can cause major problems. Clinical Psychologist and Towards Better Sleep Facilitator, Kathryn Smith, says; “The part of your brain that monitors mood and emotions, called the amygdala, is affected when you are sleep deprived, causing you to overreact to situations that normally wouldn’t bother you.”

Research suggests, and anecdotally I can concur, that lack of sleep can also lead to increased stress, as well as anxiety and depression, all of which put pressure on relationships” Smith says. Often people think there are problems with their relationships when in reality, the stressors and irritations are a result of not enough sleep or other lifestyle choices.

Lack of sleep can also lead to a decline in overall health, with your body deprived of the downtime it needs to restore and replenish cells. Enter the relationship triple threat- stressed, tired and sick. An unhealthy you can often lead to an unhealthy relationship and some very testing times.  According to the National Sleep Foundation, evidence suggests that people with insomnia have a ten-fold risk of developing depression and an increased risk of other co-morbid conditions.

Another key consideration when it comes to relationships is the importance of giving each other enough time. It can be challenging to feed your relationship when life pulls you from pillar to post, and with Mr Sandman beckoning, date night can fall to the wayside. Setting aside time and committing to quality time together can make a real difference.

However, the underlying sleep problems or other health concerns that are affecting a relationship need to be addressed and it’s important to encourage your significant other to seek professional help.

Clinical Psychologist Kathryn Smith and Psychiatrist Dr Curt Gray have been effectively treating insomnia with cognitive behavioural therapy through their long-standing group programme, Towards Better Sleep. Unlike sleep medication, CBT is not a quick fix and takes time to work, which is why the programme spans across 6 weeks, focusing on education, behavioural techniques, correcting faulty thinking and relaxation strategies.

A group setting has proven an effective setting to treat people with sleep problems, allowing participants to share their experiences and learn from one another in a more cost-effective way. If you think you could benefit from group therapy, talk to your GP about your suitability for the Towards Better Sleep programme. Or, if you would like to speak to a Psychologists about improving your relationship, visit our website for the list of Clinical Psychologist based at Morningside and Newmarket.




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Are you channelling Mary Poppins?

Posted on March 24, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

Psychology Consultants, Brisbane

When you think about it, Mary Poppins is not really the best role model for children or adults for that matter. “Practically perfect in every way”… if only she knew that perfectionism is practically a disease.

A perfectionist, as defined by the Oxford Dictionary is “A person who refuses to accept any standard short of perfection”. This philosophy is therefore based on a fear of failing. Living in constant fear of falling short or making a mistake, the perfectionist can live with high levels of anxiety and stress often leading to other mental health issue. Striving for perfection is simply not sustainable; it’s a completely subjective and abstract notion that defies the very meaning of being human.

The irony is, the underlying motive for most perfectionists is success which will ultimately lead to happiness (apparently). However, history would show that people who have achieved great success, are not in fact perfectionists but those who are comfortable enough to make mistakes. Take Steve Jobs for example, his life principals were based around two things, the power of positive thinking and allowing yourself to fail. “I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life”. Steve Jobs 2005

Learning to let go doesn’t mean dropping your standards but rather, allowing yourself to embrace the opportunities and enlightenment that can come from making mistakes. It’s about disassociating perfection with self-worth; it need not define you.

If you are raising children, or even have grown up ones, the need to ‘let it go’ as the Ice Queen would chant, is even more important. Children model their behaviour and perception of the world based on their parents, teachers and carers. Demonstrating through words, actions and experiences, that it is okay to fail, will teach children to reach for the stars without a fear of falling.

Recognising that perfection won’t bring you happiness and showing yourself the compassion, you would to others who fall short, is the first step to your personal peace treaty. If you need help with personal strategies to emancipate yourself from perfection, visit our website to read about our team of experienced Clinical Psychologists who are committed to helping you flourish. http://psychologyconsultants.com.au/psychologists-2/




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Caught in an Anxiety Fog?

Posted on March 17, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

Kind of like driving a car in a bad fog, it’s hard to think clearly and make good decisions when you are overwrought, overwhelmed and feeling anxious. If only clearing your brain fog was as easy as turning on the windscreen wipers. It may not be quite this simple but there are some simple ways to think more clearly and make better decisions when you feel like anxiety related brain fog has taken hold.

Although ‘brain fog’ can be caused by a number of medical conditions, this article focuses on what to do when you have anxiety related brain fog. The first step is to identify that it is anxiety that is clouding your vision and impairing your cognitive function. The next step is to stop focusing on your anxiety. It is common when entrenched in a bout of anxiety to become obsessed with how you are feeling, to worry about how it may impact on your family, work and life. Internally focused thoughts will only worsen symptoms of brain fog, that may include, a lack of concentration, fatigue, irritability, intense fear and irrational thoughts. It can be difficult to acknowledge that you are becoming internally focused when you are in the thick of it but by understanding your stressors and what triggers your anxiety, you can take better control of your thought process.

Anxiety related brain fog results from elevated stress hormones causing the body to react by suppressing the rationalisation and core memory part of the brain (the cortex and hippocampus) and increasing areas of the brain (the amygdala) designed to respond to danger. Once the mind recognises that there is no real threat or danger, stress levels will reduce, the body will calm and anxiety will ease.

Everyone’s external stressors or triggers are different and it’s important to recognise what causes you to have an overly anxious mindset. A calming mantra that works for you when you are caught in the thick of anxiety can be very helpful in reducing stress levels. In treating anxiety, psychologists often use Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to help people identify when their thought patterns are negative and replace them with more helpful thoughts, resulting in more positive behavioural outcomes. Part of cognitive behavioural therapy in treating anxiety is monitoring your ‘self-talk’ and testing realities of negative talk by evaluating the thoughts that lead to unhelpful fears and beliefs.  The treatment focuses on questioning the negative thoughts and beliefs that lead to the feelings of anxiousness in various situations.

Working with a Clinical Psychologist to design your own personal strategies to manage anxiety may help you feel more empowered and in control of your mind. Whilst addressing any underlying causes of your anxiety may help you to overcome it in the long run.

For more information on anxiety treatment, visit http://psychologyconsultants.com.au/anxiety/

To view our team of Clinical Psychologists, visit the Brisbane Psychologists page here.


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What to expect from Group Therapy

Posted on March 13, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

Group therapy can be confronting and off-putting for some people; let’s face it, talking to strangers about your struggles is not for everyone. But when it comes to treating insomnia or eating problems, it’s really very effective, enabling people with similar personal problems but completely different life experiences to share and learn from one another.

Most groups and in particular, our insomnia program, Towards Better Sleep, offer small groups of no more than 9 participant the opportunity to learn about insomnia treatment approaches in an intimate and confidential setting. Towards Better Sleep, is run over four, one hour sessions typically spread out over 6 to 8 weeks.

With the guidance of two experienced facilitators, participants come away from the program equipped with clinically proven methods for better sleep. Once more, the group setting allows participants to gain a new perspective on sleep and learn how others might deal with their individual situations.

TBS Facilitators: Kathryn Smith & Dr Curt Gray

Towards Better Sleep facilitators, Dr Curt Gray (Psychiatrist) and Kathryn Smith (Clinical Psychologist) have been running the group for over 15 years and have witnessed first-hand the profound results of the cognitive behavioural therapy program.

“When you are struggling with something like ongoing insomnia, it can be hard to believe that anyone else can be doing it as tough as you but once they start the program, they quickly see how common their experiences are”, says Kathryn Smith.

“When you are surrounded with people who have taken the courage to reach out for help and take charge of their life, there is a high level of respect and validation amongst the group”, notes Ms Smith.

Another key benefit of group therapy is the extra change in your back pocket, with it being a more cost-effective way to see a therapist. You might also find when surrounded by others who are in a similar situation, that there is an added level of support that cannot be found in individual therapy.

Working in a group to overcome problems, like insomnia can also reveal personal insights that you may not otherwise have recognised. Facilitators work to ensure that group therapy is a safe, confidential and welcoming space, allowing you to learn more about yourself to improve your outlook and general wellbeing as well as the task at hand.

The next Towards Better Sleep programme commences on Thursday 18th July. To learn more about it or to register visit www.towardsbettersleep.com.au






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Welcome Dr Nicola Spence to our Morningside practice

Posted on March 13, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

MA (Hons), DClinPsy, MAPS
Master of Arts (Hons) – Psychology, Doctorate of Clinical Psychology
Membership: Australian Psychological Society

Nicola has worked as a Clinical Psychologist in both the UK and Australia since 2011. She has held various positions in the fields of adult mental health and forensic mental health over this time and we are now pleased that she is joining the team at Psychology Consultants, Morningside.

In her work, Nicola uses an integrative approach, drawing on various therapy modalities to adapt therapy to best suit the needs of each person. She primarily draws upon the evidence-based therapies of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Compassion-focused Therapy (CFT) and Motivational Interviewing (MI).

Nicola’s areas of interest include working with people who experience a range of difficulties, including anxiety (e.g. phobias, OCD, social anxiety), depression, trauma and stress, self-esteem difficulties, occupational stress and addictions. In addition to offering direct intervention, Nicola is also passionate about the development of others and offers clinical supervision and training to other clinicians.

Nicola works from the Morningside office on Thursday & Friday; please phone (07) 3395 8633 to make an appointment.

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Psychology Consultants Celebrates 20 years

Posted on February 19, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

Psychology Consultants has a lot to smile about, as 2019 marks the privilege of helping people for 20 years.

Windsor local, Dr Stan Steindl, who started his career at Kids Help Line at age 19, officially established the Psychology practice on 1 January 1999, bringing in the New Year with a new purpose and mission in life; to help others and alleviate suffering.

The then Canon Hill practice, started as a one-man band and now 20 years later operate from two sites in Morningside and Newmarket with 20+ Clinical Psychologists and admin staff.

“At first I spent quite a lot of time waiting for the phone to ring. When it did ring, it was usually my mother calling to see how things were going,” comments business founder, Dr Steindl.

“But gradually things got busy and by 2000 I was bringing other Clinical Psychologists in to work with me.”

Queensland is home to more than 426,000 small businesses, an important core of every industry sector. They are in every community in every region, represent over 97% of businesses state-wide, and employ approximately 44% of all private sector workers (https://www.business.qld.gov.au/starting-business/advice-support/support/small-business/small-businesses-qld).

“Small business can be tough, with a very precise recipe required for growth and success; for us it came down to good partnership, government support and of course clients who needed our help,” says co-owner and Clinical Psychologist Kathryn Smith, who joined the practice in 2005.

“Recently a client expressed her gratitude and stated that I had helped her immensely and had changed her life”, continues Ms Smith.

“I thought, wow, I am privileged to be in such a position to be able to offer this and that makes my work worthwhile”.

The business saw significant growth after the introduction of the Medicare Benefits Schedule initiative, that commenced 1 November 2006 and in 2019 employs 20 staff across two practice locations at Morningside and Newmarket.

“When the business was first established there was no Medicare rebates, with people accessing psychological therapy through private health insurance or Employee Assistance Programs (EAP), and sometimes through other insurance claims such as third party insurance or Workcover”, says Dr Steindl.

Dr Steindl says that after 20 years in business, he feels most satisfied knowing that he has now worked with hundreds of people to try to help alleviate suffering.

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Welcome Dr Madan to our Newmarket Practice

Posted on February 6, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

Psychology Consultants warmly welcomes Dr Madan to the Newmarket team. Dr Madan is a Clinical Psychologist and Neuropsychologist who enjoys working with people of all ages with mild-to-severe mental health conditions. She completed a Doctorate of Clinical Psychology and Clinical Neuropsychology at the University of Queensland.

She has practiced in Australia, London, and Ireland, in a variety of settings, including government services, community neuro-rehabilitation, private clinics, and hospital inpatient and outpatient services. She has specialised experience in treating a range of mental health conditions, including depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, emotion dysregulation, trauma, and adjustment difficulties following major life transitions (e.g., grief and bereavement, trauma, separation, and parenting).

Dr Madan utilises a range of evidence-based therapy techniques in her practice including Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Mindfulness and Positive Psychology. Her therapeutic practice focuses on enhancing emotional awareness, managing difficult emotional experiences (stress, anxiety, anger and depression) while working towards developing more positive patterns of communication and behaviour. She is particularly passionate about developing targeted interventions aimed at bolstering individual resilience and coping with loss, trauma, and disability. Dr Madan has published in peer reviewed journal articles that have examined hope and psychological adjustment to chronic illness and disability.

Dr Madan works from our Newmarket practice on Monday as well as Thursday 2:30-7:00pm & Friday 2:00-6:30pm. Please contact reception to make an appointment (07) 3356 8255

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How to quieten the mind

Posted on January 10, 2019 in Uncategorized - 0

Do you ever feel like a little rat running on a wheel? Or is your mind like a circus with so much going on, you don’t even know what to cast your eye on. You are not alone; the constant noise and pace of our modern world causes many of us to feel stressed and overwhelmed, often impacting sleep and overall wellbeing. It can be difficult to quieten your mind but not impossible if you prioritise it, and as the New Year rolls around, what better time make a fresh start.

Here’s a few ways you can drown out the noise and quieten your mind in 2019.

  1. Just Breathe.

Deep, deliberate breathing promotes calm behaviour, encourages focus and with the right technique will help you relax and prepare for the task at hand. Combined with a mantra, something like ‘I am prepared, I am focused, I will do my best’, deep breathing can help you feel more in control. By breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth, more oxygen will be circulated to the muscles and brain, thereby improving concentration and reducing stress. Check out the ‘Compassionate Initiate’ on Sound Cloud: https://soundcloud.com/jamesn-kirby/sets/compassionate-mind-training

  1. Prioritise Exercise

We all know the benefits exercise brings, but it can sometimes seem like yet another thing to add to your busy to do list. The key to incorporating exercise into your daily regime, is choose a physical activity that you actually enjoy. Just a technology free walk in the great outdoors can be soothing for the soul and give you time to think things through.

  1. Practice Yoga or Meditation

It’s not for everyone but Yoga, has proven benefits to mind and body. According to Washington DC based Sleep Foundation, a lack of physical activity as well as stress and too much screen time are the leading causes of sleep disturbance. Combining physical activity and meditation through yoga, is for many people a very effective way to help the mind and body relax. The meditative effects of yoga on the body are very similar to the process of falling asleep, whereby the heartbeat and brain waves become slower.

  1. Turn up the tunes

Music has been clinically proven to help regulate our emotions and so when feeling stressed, overwhelmed or even a little sad, playing the right tune will help alter how you are feeling. Creating a ‘quieten your mind’ playlist can be a great way to chill out and destress.

  1. Pat your pooch

The benefits of animal therapy are clinically recognised worldwide, used for psychological conditions like Posttraumatic Stress Disorders, as well as Anxiety and Spectrum Disorders. Simply sitting, patting or walking your protective and loyal pet, who loves you unconditionally, can lower stress levels.

  1. Take a break from technology

Our ability to completely switch ‘swipe’ off from the world has set a new-age challenge, with many of us so addicted to our phones that the idea of switching it off or leaving it at home is totally absurd. In fact, so absurd that for many people, particularly amongst the younger generation, it causes a great deal of stress to be without one’s phone. But all of the noise and distraction of technology can make it very difficult to be present and even harder to quieten the mind. Try allocating some screen free time into your day and see if you feel calmer.

For more articles like this, follow us on Facebook or to view our team of Clinical Psychologists, click here. 




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